she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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