Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
