so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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