is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
