ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
