Apparently you make a good broom.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
