omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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