my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
