belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Randomize