Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
