Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
