:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
