Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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