margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Randomize
