dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
