I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
