her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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