I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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