At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
