There was a lot of him and a little penis
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
