So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
