Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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