In the future we'll all be gay
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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