eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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