ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
i believe in u and ur pee
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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