I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
40s are totally the cure
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
