So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
