I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
