He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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