I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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