I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize