the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
