Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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