I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
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