Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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