Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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