Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
