The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
