what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
