At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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