I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
