What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
