you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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