I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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