At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Someone came in the potted fern
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
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