i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
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