then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize