speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
this will be a night to untag.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
