I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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