Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
