i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize