So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Randomize