i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
